So, guess who’s turning 22 in exactly 7 days. Yep, that’s right 22. I’m not quite sure how I feel about this. At times I feel like I’m very young because if I were to live until I was about 70, I roughly have about 50 years left. And that seems like an eternity on earth. But at other times when I look around and see the people my age already in long-term relationships (some even married!) or already have serious jobs (adult jobs as I like to say) it worries me. I feel like I’m being left behind, that I’m missing out or that I’m just not doing life ‘right’. I even wrote a really sad poem (as in pathetic as well as crying-sad) the other day and no, I’m not going to share that with you, got to protect that little dignity I have left (haha). But on a more serious note, you see the thing is I’m scared. There I said it.
I know I don’t have to be, that everything will fall into it’s place and that God will take care of me and He will lead me. So that got me thinking, as long as I do God’s will I will be okay, right? No, I guess I’ll be more than just okay. But then that got me thinking (I know I over think, definitely need to stop that) what is God’s will for me. Like how do I know this is what he wants for me to do. I’ve come across Christians who get clear signs (like a billboard saying something about India and my friend was asking God whether she should go there, guess she got her answer) but with me, I’m a doubter. When I say I’m a doubter I mean I question everything. So signs wouldn’t really be my thing and to be honest I don’t ever get signs (or maybe I just don’t look hard enough) and I don’t know if this is offending to Christians out there (sorry if it is) it just seems superstitious to me. Anyways so there I was at 2 am lying awake in my bed unable to fall asleep. So what does the regular worried 21 year old do when they’re freaking out at 2 am about life, (order pizza of course! just kidding..) they find out what John MacArthur has to say about this- DUH. If you at this point are wondering who he is…YOUTUBE HIM RIGHT THIS MINUTE (only if you want to) Okay, so I found a sermon by Johnny that was titled ‘Taking the mystery out of God’s will’. Needless to say, he answered my questions (backed it up with Scripture of course) and I eventually went to sleep. I’d be lying if I said I have never felt anxious about the future again (especially when I see on my Facebook timeline) but it definitely has helped me a lot.
I guess a lot people, especially we as Christians worry about not doing the will of God and it’s scary. If you are struggling with this right now I strongly encourage you to check out the sermon if you like and I promise it’ll definitely shed some light (I’ll post the link at the bottom). If you aren’t struggling with this and you are just stalking my blog (You rawwkk!), I’d still encourage you to watch it, I mean Johnny’s sermons are pretty awesome anyway.
Okay I’m gonna stop waffling now (waffling means talking a lot, apparently Americans don’t use that term, what a waste of a beautiful word) and I jut want to say thank you for reading all the way and I hope you found this helpful or funny (or both?!) and please come back again for new posts in the future.
P.S. Happy 22nd Birthday to me! (: